Combintation of : I’m scared
i’m scared of 11 o’clock.
the manager of the manager’s manager is going to meet with us, only our department.. i’m scared, what could he possibly want to tell us? clearing his busy schedule for an 11’oclock trip to ahmadi meeting!!?? why…
if i’m scared, then i must’ve been doing something wrong. yep! i haven’t been a knock-on-wood excellent employee, my attendance sheet is nothing i’m proud of. i would not dare to blame that on hajar, it’s because i want to change my job so badly so desperatly.. i want to have a wasta.. why can’t i have a wasta to take me from this place?!!! i’ve been trying for a year now to leave, and nothing bright appears!
i’m scared of 11 oclock… that it might be the hour a new department manager will be declared, i’m scared it would be that fan of slavery big headed jerk, that pseudo-man who is sometimes nicknamed as wasta-king. why would a semi-guy be having so many wasta’s? i hate him so much, he is direspectful of every body especially women. i can’t believe he could be managing me, having authority over me…i don’t want to stay here a second if that happens… please God, give me another job, a better job…
why can’t i be a wasta girl… a wasta queen, the go to -person when in need of wasta…. WHY!!!!!!!! why can’t i know someone who is big on wasta… how i wish.. how i wish.. cz kuwait is nothing but a haven for wasta..
i’m scared that i might not make it to hajj this year, even though i’ve been saving religiously for it… i’m scared Ot might not be ready, or might change his mind the very last day.. i’m scared even though i am so ready for hajj…
scared of being comfortable with my current life.